Saturday, October 10, 2009
Say you're sorry, that face of an angel
Comes out just when you need it to
As I paced back and forth all this time
Cause I honestly believed in you
Holding on, the days drag on
Stupid girl, I should have known
I should have known
I'm not a princess, this ain't a fairy tale
I'm not the one you'll sweep off her feet
Lead her up the stairwell
This ain't Hollywood, this is a small town
I was a dreamer before you went and let me down
Now it's too late for you and your white horse, to come around
Baby I was naive, got lost in your eyes
And never really had a chance
I had so many dreams about you and me
Happy endings, now I know
I'm not a princess, this ain't a fairy tale
I'm not the one you'll sweep off her feet
Lead her up the stairwell
This ain't Hollywood, this is a small town
I was a dreamer before you went and let me down
Now it's too late for you and your white horse, to come around
And there you are on your knees
Begging for forgiveness, begging for me
Just like I always wanted but I'm so sorry
Cause I'm not your princess, this ain't a fairytale
I'm gonna find someone someday who might actually treat me well
This is a big world, that was a small town
There in my rearview mirror disappearing now
And its too late for you and your white horse
Now its too late for you and your white horse, to catch me now
Oh, whoa, whoa, whoa
Try and catch me now
Oh, it's too late to catch me now
spoke at : 7:31 PM
i want to go asian age.shouldnt have gone for the meeting this mrng. then i wouldnt feel so bad abt not going. BLEH
ok. my blog is so dead and stuff. its quite pointless to blog cos i dont think anyone ever comes here anymore but ohwell. blogging for the sake of blogging.
im damn sick of studying alr. and im like desperately trying to figure out what the first semester stuff is about cos i slacked my first semester away. which is damn stupid. i kind of wished i took CTs cos then i would have studied for it. but then again if i took CTs and did badly, my parents would be giving me a damn hard time now.
well anyway. so im not going asian age anymore. which sucks. cos it was the meet i wanted to qualify for at sing open cos its in JAPAN. but nvm lah. surprisingly i dont really mind that much. like half half. ohwell. hopefully i have other meets at the end of the year then it wont be so bad. but at the moment, i reaally wanna go but my dad says dont change mind alr. focus on studying. bleh.
hai. nvm. i have a lot to look forward to after promos. first priority: get promoted. haha. seriously. if i do damn badly at promos i can probably forget about going for anymore overseas meets. so this sucks.
but i will just try my best. i guess. if i can endure studying like mad for the next 2 months which i doubt i can cos its just not me.haha. but must try lah. and take breaks once in a while. aka trng. or just slacking.
but my mum has sort of cornered me. in the sense that IF i dont do well at promos, and i tell her that i tried my best. it means my best isnt good enough to cope with swimmign and studies. i think in rgs the reason i studied was cos i needed to do well enough to satisfy my parents to swim. like they will threaten with things like if you dont do well you cant go for the ssc kunming trng camp for eg. but it was a lot easier in rgs cos things were tested in modules.
you know back in those ssc days, and some other ppl will complain to me that their parents always scold them if they dont do pb or beat this person. i would do anything for my parents to be like that. that actually support my swimming like fully. but im not good enough for my mum to think that swimming is worth supporting.
and theres As next year and i really dont know if i should just keep swimming. but i guess i will as long as i like it.
anyway. i want the rome people to faster come back. esp ting and rainer. haah. trng hsa been damn -.-. its like self trng lah. like on saturday mrng only me, joel, nick chew and jon chen did the set. even though we didnt finish it.
spoke at : 12:35 PM
i need to snap out of this mood where i dont feel like doing anything at all. and i mean anything. help): plus i keep thinking abt sth which i said i wont anymore. and its so stupid cos its still a long way to go.
i know what i have to do. study etc. but i cant get myself to do it.
i feel like a zombie. like autopilot. the only time i feel remotely normal is when im with you or talking to you. even if its for that brief moment.i cant stand this.
anyway. AYG was awesome fun. sucks to be back in school though. i need to catch up. but i dont know how since i dont feel like doing anything.
rooming with ting and addy were super fun. haha. and playing bridge and taboo were awesome too. and animal concentration was quite funny.
miss the june hols. but now i shall look forward to 159 days from now. so loooong.
damn. i hate feeling this way. idk why im so affected by it and you're not.
spoke at : 1:51 PM
spoke at : 4:50 PM
i havent blogged in ages and i guess its about time
a lot of things have happened in the past few weeks. and its been an emotional rollercoaster.
but i think now im either used to it already or things have gotten better.
so anyways. so many things have happened and i dont think i want to bring it up again. or rather i just dont feel like talking about it. this blog is so dead now. im just too lazy to update it anymore.
training has been alright. except that i fell sick ssaturday night and now im on antibiotics which suck cos i feel so weak in the pool then cannot swim properly. plus its so close to sing open and i keep feeling like slacking! haha.
and im so grateful its the june holidays. (:
yups.
nothing much to say.
good luck to those in malaysia!! i wanna go too! lol. but then i guess if i went i woouldnt be around for rainer's bday. so its a good thing i didnt go.(:
spoke at : 9:24 PM
HAPPY 17th BIRTHDAY!
heres wishing the most awesome guy a very happy birthday!!
love you lots
xoxo
rachie!
spoke at : 9:18 PM
i dont like the way i am now. i dont feel like ME.
when im too afraid to let my guard down or too afraid to believe whats happening now and that the problem has been solved (kind of). im too afraid to trust too much. i hate feeling like this. but it hurt too much this time and i dont know how to stop feeling this way.
i dont like being moody or having to put on a facade.
sometimes i wish i could go back to those ssc days where all of us went high all the time at training. where things were so easy. man. i miss ssc.
omg i sound so emo.
i will stop talking abt that now
and talk about sth elsel.
school's been alright. my class is retarded(in a gd way) like today we were like standing outside the LT with bengoh and alvin pointing at each other and laughing and all of us standing arnd and laughing at them. i swear ben goh's laugh is damn funny.
trainings been ok. but im always damn tired and i keep feeling as if i wanna stop.
school nats! its damn lame that theres heats for 100fly but no heats for 50 fly. -.- so i only get to miss sch on thursday.
spoke at : 4:27 PM
i want to get today over with
spoke at : 6:41 PM
rachie!(: 